The current snowstorms will be threatening many families’ plans this Christmas. This can cause real problems for children and parents who have made arrangements for Christmas contact.
The snow and travel conditions might make it impossible for contact to take place in some cases.
Christmas contact, as with any contact arrangements, should be stuck to if at all possible. Certainty has the following benefits
- The children themselves know what is happening and what to expect
- The children get to enjoy as full a relationship as possible with both parents
- The children get to experience Christmas traditions and rites with both parents
- The serious conflict arising from unfulfilled arrangements is avoided
But what happens if contact simply cannot take place because the travel required is too dangerous?
Many parents will have made plans for how they are going to spend Christmas when their children are with them. These arrangements may well have been only possible as a result of expensive and painful applications through the courts.
If contact does not take place as arranged then there will be an overwhelming sense of disappointment. It is likely that frustration and anger will also feature strongly.
Both parents need to be extremely careful and take careful views on the following
- Is travel safe or not? Remember, just because it is possible might not mean that it is safe.
- Is it possible to agree on who or how travel safety is determined? BBC road reports? The AA?
- Has travel been made impossible by some other authority, such as closed airports or cancelled trains?
- What will the children’s experience of travel be? Will spending many hours on a snow jammed motorway in the dark be a positive experience?
- How might experience of this Christmas and forced Christmas travel colour a willingness on the part of the children to travel next Christmas?
- What alternative arrangements can be put in place, if any? Can we move contact back by a few days, even if that means either or both parents changing their plans?
Parents should ensure that they do all that is reasonable to ensure that contact takes place.
A parent who has a track record of not allowing contact to take place who is seen as having used very slight snowy in their area as an excuse, is likely to be strongly criticised by the court. Their actions must be seen in the broader context of past conduct in frustrating contact. It will be tempting for such parents to simply say “It’s snowing, therefore no contact.” That alone will not be good enough.
Similarly, a parent who is very upset that contact arrangements are not taking place will be very tempted to see this as further evidence of the other parent’s attempts to block contact and undermine the relationship between them and their children. Care needs to be taken that that frustration does not spill over into aggressive behaviour
As I write this it occurs to me that immediately accessible telephone mediation processes should be made available for families who face these difficulties over the Christmas and New Year period. I wonder if any mediation firms have thought of that?
Mogers Solicitors will be open in between Christmas and New Year on the 29th and 30th December. We hope you will not need us, but if you do then we will be here.
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